Virginity- Glamour

In March 2011 Glamour Magazine an article was written by a Mormon 27 year old woman who chose to wait her whole life to have sex...but then decided she was missing out and gave in and started "living"....meaning having sex.

Virginity

I have done a lot of things in my life that I have enjoyed, valued, hated, regreted and laughed about. I feel that I have lived life. I try to take advantage of opportunities that have been placed or earned in my life. I have made wrong decisions that I am not proud of.

When it comes to having sex this day in age I often wonder if our society has become too numb to the true sensuality of romance and realtionships. Call me old fashion, or a religious fanatic but I am basic. I want to be able to give myself to one man. I want to allow myself to dream and believe that there is someone out there in the void who still wants a woman who has saved herself. In the article the author said that men are not attracted to woman who are virgins. Is this true?

I am not saying that I am a saint- meaning that I have never participated in things that I shouldn't or things that I know that I enjoy and want to do again! :) However, that is my past- I want to leave my past where it belongs. Do I want sex in my life? Of Course I do! Maybe even more so than most do because I have waited for so long. I am a 27 year old woman who has decided to not participate in traditional sex until I am married. Does that mean that I cannpt allowmyself to date or even marry someone who also has saved himself? No, it doesn't. I believe that the past is the past and we live it, learn from it and move on. However, I am not more attracted to or less attracted to men who have had sex prior to marriage.

Read the article and let me know what you think.

My 1st Valentines Day

This is my first Valentines Day all to myself

I went to bed last night so excited for Valentines Day this year. I have been so blessed in my life to have amazing and extraordinary Valentine Days. From a young age I have been allowed to dream, believe and value romance. Valentines Day has always been such an awareness to me that I know incredible men who are loving, respectful and expressive. For the first time in my life I am experiencing myself.

Last Valentines Day my boyfriend and I didn't even celebrate. We were with his family and so there was no romance, flowers etc.... I remember thinking that for the first time in my life I didn't recieve flowers on Valentines Day. Even on my mission I got flowers...What the .....;) Surprisingly though I was okay. All I cared about was that I was spending time with someone that I loved and he loved me.

This year however, I was speaking with my Father right before a date and he said "Now Kristi Ann, you need to find out if you like this young man and if you do you need to tell him that he MUST make plans to spoil you on Valentines Day because if not, you will end up allowing yourself to spend the evening with someone you do not truly see yourself with and you'll allow yourself to believe that flowers, chocolates and an expensive dinner means that you are of worth. Don't do that to yourself, Honey. Allow yourself to be with who you want to be with and if you can't then don't be with anyone."

I love my Dad! His words really hit me hard. I allowed myself to take some time to think back on past Valentine Days. I realized that he is right. I did want to find out if I liked that guy or not but I felt confident enough that there was no way in hell that he was going to ask me out for Valentines Day. The older they get, the slower they move. lol So, I woke up this morning very excited to experience whatever emotions would be coming my way as I experienced today by myself.

I woke up this morning around 4am to wonderful text messages. Again, I know incredible men and I am so grateful for their friendship, love and care. By the time I got out of bed I was running to the bathroom incredibly sick....I was sick all morning. I was determined however to have a good Valentines day. So, when I was finally able to keep a little food down, I decided to go take a breath of fresh air. I took my car as high as roads would allow me up provo canyon and then I hiked up until I could see the sun setting over the mountians and the lake.

As I was up there with my binoculars, scriptures, journal and camera I realized something flutter inside my heart that gave me validation. Today I was searching within myself for a confidence to be able to hope for truth, honesty, goodness and love within another person but what I realized is that it had been so long since I felt all those things towards myself. I told myself truths like: "I have allowed myself to look for love in the wrong places." I was honest with myself by saying "I cannot allow myself to let someone treat me like I am not worth being honest to." I allowed myself to believe that thanks to recent interaction with someone (not to mention names) I believe that goodness does exist in men today and there are still some men out there who are still attracted to goodness- so I do not have to worry about guys thinking about whether or not I am a good person. Its okay to be good. I also had to tell myself "Kristi, it is okay to love." If you are reading this blog then you know that I naturally love people. Unfortunately sometimes my heart gets hurt too much and sometimes it wants to give up helping that one student, or forgiving over and over that one guy or trying to make peace with those who are hard to get along with. I use to tell my missionaries at the MTC " You MUST wear your heart on your sleeve. Give your heart to everyone you come in contact with." I still believe that Love is pure and worth while.

Today I came down off of that mountian satisfied with myself and believing more so than I have in years that I have what it takes to allow myself to fall in love with not just a talented person, attractive person or fun but a good person who knows himself, who takes the time to learn what he has to offer and who believes in love . Until then, I need to be picky.

To the Men:

To those sweethearts who have been so wonderful to ask me out through out the years....Thank you. To those who I have dated and we decided to take a break....thank you for allowing yourself to care for me. To those attractive men who are always there to flirt with, go have a crazy time with and make memories with...thank you for making life interesting. For those who I have sincerely dated and we have gone our separate ways...thank you for teaching me more about love. Now finally, to those who asked me out for today, I am sorry. I do not mean to be hurtful but I need to be truthful to myself. And last but not least to the few I have not yet met or to those who I have and I am wondering if you feel a similar connection that I do....please don't give up! Please believe that I am coming around. I am realizing that I am ready =)

Happy Valentines Day! xoxo

Educational Counseling Bio

Miss Kristi A. Orchard

Kristi A. Orchard was born and raised in Payson, Utah and is a graduate of Payson Sr. High School where she was involved in academics, clubs, student government and athletics. Kristi earned her BS degree from Brigham Young University Idaho in Sociology/ Criminology. She also participated in Presidential Student Leadership, AWS, NSO, ASA, and was one of the founders of the Native American Club. Kristi will be graduating May 1, 2010 with an MS in Educational Counseling.

Kristi worked as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) through High School, at the Police Department through College and as a Teacher at the Missionary Training Center (MTC) through Graduate School. Kristi Previously transferred to Karl G. Maeser Prep Academy from Provo High School. She is currently a fulltime counselor as well as a Why Try Instructor and Assistant Girls Basketball Coach at Maeser Prep.

Kristi participates in the following organizations: RAMACAC, USCA, ASCA, ASA, Military Child Education Coalition, UACTE and Collegeboard.

What a pain in the neck!

SO, hopefully this was my last neck surgery. On friday I went in to have yet another neck surgery. Prayers were answered though and the surgery went very well. So well in fact that I didn't take any medicine and by Sunday afternoon I was down for the count and that continued through Monday. I can't believe how much rest I have gotten. It is so good for me :) Things should be back to normal for me tomorrow. Work as usual and hopefully I can get back into the swing of things right away. I need to build up my neck muscles so that I can try surfing- baja is less than a month away! I love spring break!!!!!

Contracts, Opportunities, and New Beginings

I just signed a contract at Karl G. Maeser Prep. Academy as their new Educational Guidance Counselor. I am so excited. I have loved my time there thus far and am excited for the future. Next year I will be the counselor for grades 7-9th. We will be in a new building which will be identical to the Karl G. Maeser building on BYU campus. The School will be located on 1600 in Orem but is technically on the border of Orem and Lindon. My school will be claiming Lindon as their home.
I am also looking to buy a house right now and the process is a little bit slower than I thought that it would be. There is a house I really like in Orem right by where the new school is being built. I need it to come down just a little bit more before I make an offer. Its a tri-level 5 bedroom, two bathroom, sun-room, deck, patio, two car garage, basketball court beautiful yard opportunity. so we will see what happens. Keep your fingers crossed.
As for other opportunities, I have been conducting research with some BYU professors and my co-counselor at Maeser Prep. It has been going very well and I will be presenting the info at the Utah/National ACT Conference in March and also the USCA/UACTE Conference in June. Also, my co-counselor is going to Afganistan and so I am filling in for him on the Utah ACT board as well as the USCA board while he is gone. Also in June at the USCA/UACTE Conference I will be conducting a presentation for Utah Charter School Counselors. This presentation will deal with crisis plans, networking as well as forming a solid representation of Charter School Counselors. I started a blog called Charter Schools in Action. This blog is to help all Utah School Counselors network with one another and help each other with Guidance Curriculum. In June we hope to nominate a Pres, VP and Secretary so that we then can take turns attending the State Charter School Meetings.
I take the Praxis on March 13th and I am scared to death. I really hope that I pass! I am just about done with School now. I graduate May1, 2010. I still have one more class to take and then I am finished with my masters. I went to my grad fair this week and took my mom with me and she cried when they brought out my hood. I can't believe graduation day is within reach. What a great new beginning I have ahead of me.

BIGGEST NEW DEVELOPMENT

As some of you have already heard, I have transfered schools for my internship. I was wroking at Provo High School which I loved, but it was not a paid internship. While attending a Counseling Conference I met the school counselor at Karl G. Maeser and was very impressed. We later got in contact and after being invited to apply for a paid internship, I was offered the position.

Karl G. Maeser is an amazing opportunity. I have loved my time there so far! The students, faculty, parents, board and staff are all incredible people to associate with! The School is currently located in Lindon, Utah. The BIG Christmas present this years for the school was the announcement of the new building that will be completed by next fall. The school currently has grades 9-12 but next year will be enrolling 7-12. I am so excited to be apart of such an amazing program. School is based on a Socratic learning system which is an amazing way for the students to learn and develop.

I know that God is truly putting opprtunities and people in my path to bless my life- Karl Maeser being one of those tender mercies. It's an exciting time for me in the development of my career and my training as a School Counselor.

"Fall" N 2 the CRAZE

I'm sure that most of you are most curious about Dylan. Dylan and I met at a conference for School Counselors. He recently moved here to Utah and currently is working in Utah County. I laugh everytime I think back to his first smooth introductory lines at that conference! If you would like to hear the story I would be more than happy to share it with you but to be honest- he tells it the best!

We've been dating for a couple months now and are enjoying the life of School Counseling and adventure! Since we have met we have traveled to Idaho, Vegas, San Diego, and Jackson Hole. He likes to be on the move and see new things as I do- so that makes it fun. If you are having a hard time finding me at home and you know I am not at work then I am usually with Dylan either on a road trip, at borders, hangin' with fam, or chillin' at his place watchin' a movie. It's been fun livin' the life and sharing similar interests, hobbies and talents.

Thats us in a nut shell :)

Long Time Comin'

Well, Since my trip to Yellowstone, my life has really gotten busy. When I got back I started my internship at Provo High School, was still working at the MTC, still doubled up on classes, and I started dating someone. Needless to say my fall flew by. I'm now getting ready for the new year a little older now, more tired, but so excited for what 2010 has in store!

Yellowstone Fever

A bunch of us all got together and decided to take a last minute road trip through Yellowstone park. We camped, we hiked, we went to a meladrama, big judds, swam in hot springs, and saw all the beautiful sights and animals.

Again we had a diverse group of people with us which made it all the more interesting. We took two different cars and went and saw the sights in Idaho Falls and Rexburg. I am so blessed to have such great friends!

Crash and Burn

My friends and I formed a wheel gang that encompassed every different kind of wheel. We had a beach crusier, a mo-ped, a razer-scooter, a long board, a mountian bike etc. It was a great way to spend the 24th of July. Down near 800 out in front of Brick Oven I got on Spencers Mo-ped and took off full speed on it, not knowing how to slow down or stop. By the time I had figured it out, I crashed and slid across the road. Groups of people gawked as they all said that I hit my head pretty hard. All I knew was that I had road all over me...in my toes, my arms and my legs. I couldn't believe that I turned out to be okay! Go figure that would happen to me eh?

Fiesta Days

For the 24th of July a bunch of us got together and went to the Spanish Fork rodeo. It was a lot of fun. For many, it was there first time ever going to a rodeo. It was fun to experience it all together.

Melanie came all the way down from CLinton to go to the rodeo. It was so great to see her. I rarely get to spend time with her. Its fun spending time with with my trainer.

Spencer and Renee, Sean and his friend, Melanie, Ashley, Nicki, Kimber, Mari, Mary and Gabe, Seth, Jon and me.

We sat all the way up at the top of the stands. We coiuld see everything up there. It was a lot of fun.

St George Love

St. George was a lot of fun. We pulled another "drive-all-night-to-ge-there" trips so that we could make it on time to her temple wedding. It was so nice to be in St, George but it was even niver to see my little greenie in love and getting married. What a big step. I am so happy for her. Her wedding was a lot of fun and I am so glad that I could be there for it.

Camping Away the Summer

Camping was a huge highlight of my summer. We camped up the Uintas, up diamond fork, lake powell and in yellowstone. I bought a skeeter beeter hammock which is so nice to sleep in. I love to camp and had so much fun with my friends.

Camping with Zach was fun because he was always prepared for anything and always had his guitar with him. He makes a mean breakfast too.

Camping with my big group of friends is always a riot. I am always one of the only ones who is willing to sleep outside of a tent. lol

Summer isn't summer without camping :)

Lake Powell...worth the drive

Lake Powell was a blast. It was a quick, fun, crazy, hot trip! Dwight had a boat and people brough wake boards and we had tubes and rode on Craigs wave runner. We camped out on the rocks out on the lake and had a riot. There was a very diverse group there which made it a lot of fun and very interesting.

Me, Kimber, Ashley, Seth and Joel drove down to Lake Powell through the night. I was driving 20 miles an hour at times... I was exhausted. We got there in time to join everyone all day friday and then we didn't leave for home until Sat night. It was adventure after adventure and we made memories that will last forever! It was so much!

Zachary

WHo would have thought that me getting Swine FLu would have brough me and Zach back together again. For those who don't know Zach, I will quickly tell you our story.

The first time I met Zach was while I was on my mission and he had just got home from his mission and he was always helping the missionaries out. So, we became friends out in VA. When I got home from my mission Zach moved out to Utah. I ran into him at rock the block, he got my phone number, and we went out quite a few times. I really liked him but I was also going on dates with other guys and one other one in particular. It ended up coming down to Zach and this other guy and I picked the other guy. Zach and I remained friends but distant friends. We spoke occasionally and even went on a date at the beginning of the year before I started dating Adam.

When I got the swine flu he offered to make me waffles to help me get better....I ended up refusing and by that night I had been admitted to the hospital. Around two or three a.m. I woke up to zach next to me with a stuffed animal and bouquets of flowers...all different kinds. He was dressed from head to toe in protective wear...even a mask...the nurses made him! He came and visted me often in the hospital and even when I got out. In fact my first release day he kidnaped me and took me to a hot pot in southern utah.....

We went camping, for night motorcycle rides, to the llama fest...you name it we did it. It was so much that he was so into adventure and being outdoors....I eventually really crushed on him and the time we were spending together but in the end....we were both too stubborn and went our seperate ways. I miss him.

Swine Flu

I can't believe that I went to Mexico, I worked for a month and a half at the MTC and I didn't get the Swine Flu but eventually that all caught up to me. I was admitted to the hospital and then once out I was put in isolation. I was out of it for two weeks straight. My parents took such good care of me and nursed me back to health. Zach was a huge supporter too. I really needed him....I just didn't realize it at the time.
I got a lot of reading done, did my homework and slept a lot. It was nice also to relax with my parents and watch movies.
The swine flu was the worst pain I think that I have ever experienced but I am glad that I pulled through it. There were times throughout my hospital stay that I was in so much pain that I just wanted to give up! I am grateful for the support and love I felt and for all those who prayed for me.

Mexico Sun

This was my first time in another country...well that I had to use my passport. I loved every single minute of it! I did so many things! We stayed in a Pent House Suite, we soaked up the sun, I parasailed, went horse-back riding, went on boat cruise out to see the seals, went riding on a banana tube, saw cliff divers, went shopping, played volleyball....we did everything! It was so packed of so much fun! It was just what I needed.

I had completely broken up with Wes a few days before I went so I hadn't slept for a long time and my heart was in pieces. So the Mexico sun, adrenaline activities, and the Latin boys all gave me things to smile about. It was just what I needed to start my healing process.

It was me and Erin Rider, Jennifer Fletcher and Stacey Knight. What a great group of girls to spend a week with in Mexico!

SOFTBALL..... wasn't so soft on my body this year

Softball was definately a highlight for me this Spring and Summer. I love it so much! It's too bad that it does not love me as much this year. lol

This year I tore my quad, sliced open my leg and jammed my thumb so bad that it has been over a month and it is still jammed! It was all worth it though

I had a fun team! I didn't know anyone on my team before this year and I loved playing with them all. We were a really good team and I hated when we lost during the tournaments.

This picture is after my last game in the tournament. We lost. The girls came to watch me and we all went and got Sonic afterwards.

Nearer my God to thee

My current Elders that I am teaching are Heaven sent!
This poor Elders have been through so much though. One of the Elders in my district has a type of influenza A.... they are worried about the swine flue and so that Elder has been in quarantine and all the other elders are on preventitive medicine. Plus I tore my quad and missed their first three days in the MTC. When I came back to work they treated me like a princess whenever I had to go up and down the three flights of stairs.... they are all such sweethearts. To top it all off one day we were role playing teaching to meet needs and they taught me as myself. They asked me some questions about my personal life and I informed them that I had just broken up with my boyfriend....they said that they had noticed a difference in me when they first come into the room but the more I talk about the gospel the more excited I get and by the end of class I seem back to normal again. That broke my heart and I have tried extra hard to not let my personal life be reflected at all through my teaching or my personality while I am at work.
So, today as I was praying for the strength to be ready with excitement and focus and broke down bawling as I begged Heavenly Father to hold me today. I don't understand everything that is happening right now in my life, but it is not like me to let ANYTHING hold me back at work. I begged for forgiveness for being distracted and by the time the Elders came in I was ready and truly felt God holding me up!
The day was a spiritually packed day for us. We went to the RC and my Elder bore powerful testimony- testimony that I greatly benefitted from hearing. When class was done my Elders said that they had a surprise for me. SO, I followed them over to the main building. They took me into a room and told me to sit down as they all stood in front of me. One of the Elders said that he had felt close to God while he has been in my class and whether or not I could feel it in my lessons they wanted me to feel it now. Then one of the Elders started playing an incredible rendition of Nearer my God to Thee on the piano and then one by one my Elders joined in singing. This is their farewell song that they will be singing before they leave the MTC.
I was so touched that I sat and bawled. The poor missionaries didn't know what to do. I was super embarressed for crying so hard- but it was exactly what I needed to hear and their genuine compassion touched me to the core! As I finally faced them I saw tears in their eyes and without thinking I stood and walked over to them and started testifying...testifying about how close to God we can be and how good it feels etc. It was an experience that brough us all closer to each other and to God. I needed it desperately.
I had planned to go to the temple all week this week. However school work, depression and whatever else kept me from doing so. After my time with the Elders I felt a surge go through my body! I headed straight up to the temple- regardless of what day it was and if I might see Wes there- I went anyway!
While I was in the temple I felt so loved, accepted and calmed. The sisters were so sweet. I had worked that shift with many of them before, back when I was a temple worker and I felt so at home. I truly felt nearer to my God and felt that he knew me, and that he would help me through whatever trials I may be facing and have yet to face.
I am so grateful for his hand in my life. I see evidence of it daily!

In a Glance

I am attempting to get all caught up! I know that I haven't really written in my blog since I have been dating Wes. We both keep pretty busy and when we have had down time we usually spent it with each other so I have neglected my blog. I am so sorry.
I tried to write down some highlights and put them each in a seperate post to keep each memory organized.
I am aware that I never really wrote about me dating Adam. I hope you know that the reason was because it seemed like everyone wrote about Adam and for the most part anything that progressed between me and him I felt like the entire world already knew about it. It was a good experience for me. I was flattered that he chose to date me. We were so much alike that sometimes it was too much to handle and in the end we both had needs that werent being met and so rather than work on it we chose to say good-bye as I was in the middle of my second screening for my grad program and He was preparing to go to DC and to take the LSAT and prep for Harvard. Adam is awesome! He is doing great in DC and living the life he truly desires for himself. As for myself I passed my second go around and am now approved for my last year of my Grad program. Things worked out.

I know that many of you want to know about Wes. I am aware... or am becoming aware of how noticably happy I have been in a different way than most of you are use to. I know that most of you know me as the happy, spastic, life is a party, high spirited, goal oriented, school focused, work junky....lots of things changed when I started dating Wes. Life became more real to me. I value new things. Dating Wes has opened my eyes to the realization of what I need and what I want in my life.
I have been very distant this week and I am so sorry if I have offended any of you. I have been pretty down this week. I am not yet ready to write about Wes and I and all the adventures we've had... but I can say that I regret saying good-bye to him but I will never regret the time we've had! The good times out weigh the hard times we had and I am heart broken that we have said good-bye. I think that I am still holding out for a miracle and hoping that I will be forgiven for such a big mistake of saying good-bye.